I was a week into my temp job last year when the woman who was training me made the comment that I didn’t need to dress so formal. I was wearing high heels, a dress, makeup and a few of my favourite pieces of jewellery. I am no model, and I am not insecure enough to hide the fact that I have a LOT of weight to lose, but I knew I looked good in my presentation.

I was one of 5 people in the office big enough to be able to seat 500 and I was only scheduled to come into the office for training for another two weeks. I continued for the second week to dress up, and still received comments about how over dressed I was or that I didn’t need to dress so formal.

Then for the third and final week I decided to dress casually as everyone else in the office had. As soon as I walked in, the lady that had made the comments about me being so over dressed in the previous two weeks made the comment ‘ Oh, it’s so nice to see you in more comfortable clothes’.

Now don’t get me wrong, this lady was in no way trying to be rude, sly or belittling. She was very casual and actually we got along very well. She didn’t have some agenda to make me feel bad, but was happening was something on a deeper subconsciously level. When she said that she was happy to see me in casual clothes what she really meant was that SHE was more comfortable that I was in casual clothing, as it took the pressure of her to put in the same effort.

She never once dressed up the whole time I was there, she had a casual weekend top and jeans with sneakers everyday.

You see when you dress up and put effort into your clothes and appearance, it makes those who do not put the same effort in uncomfortable and take notice. Some will resent you for it, some will feel intimidated by it, some will try and stop you so that you come down to their level and don’t make them feel pressured to up their game.

I start my new role in exactly a week, and I plan on not only making a good first impression, but starting the commitment to my visual and outer improvement. I know that the dress code is smart professional, but for most people that means just wearing the basic navy top, black pants and simple flat black shoe. I will be putting my best foot forward, in a pair of fabulous high heels, no matter who wants to project their insecurities and personal limitations.

xxx Miss J